Ditch the Schedule: Why Summer Routines Work Better Than Schedules

Ditch the Schedule: Why Summer Routines Work Better Than Schedules

by | Child Development, Parenting, Parenting Tools, Transitions

Routines, Schedules, Parenting

Summer starts with high hopes.
“We’ll keep bedtime consistent.”
“We’ll follow a schedule.”
“We’ll stay on track.”

Then… reality hits.

By week two, your kid is still in pyjamas at 11:00 a.m., you’ve heard “I’m hungry” 17 times before noon, and you’re wondering if anyone in the house knows what day it is. (Spoiler: They don’t.)

Here’s the truth I want to shout from the sunscreen-splattered rooftops:
You don’t need a rigid schedule to create calm. You need a flexible routine.

 

Routines Offer Rhythm—Without the Rigidity

Think of routines as the gentle rhythm that guides your day.
They’re not about specific times; they’re about predictable sequences.

Instead of “Lunch at 12:00,” try “Lunch after outside time.”
Instead of “Bath at 7:00,” try “Bath after dinner and play.”
Instead of “Screen time from 2:00 to 2:30,” try “Screen time after quiet play or chores.”

These routines anchor your day, giving your child a sense of stability while giving you some breathing room when things don’t go according to plan. And let’s be honest—summer is the season of things not going according to plan.

 

Why Routines Work So Well in Summer

  1. They offer predictability. Kids thrive when they know what’s coming next—even if the clock isn’t running the show.
  2. They allow for flexibility. No stress if you’re late getting out the door or the sprinkler play goes long.
  3. They help with transitions. “After lunch comes quiet time” is a lot easier than dragging a child away from Lego because “it’s 1:00.”
  4. They reduce power struggles. Kids love control. When they know the rhythm, they feel more in control—without needing to be in control.

 

How to Build a Simple Summer Routine

Start with natural anchor points in your day:

  • Wake up

  • Meals

  • Outside time or outings

  • Quiet time or screen time

  • Bath + bedtime wind-down

Then decide what typically happens after each one. That’s your sequence. No alarms needed.

Here’s a basic example:

  • Wake up → breakfast → outside time

  • Lunch → quiet play or screens

  • Snack → creative play or outing

  • Dinner → bath → books → bed

You can swap, shift, or stretch based on your family’s needs. That’s the beauty of it.

 

The Goal Isn’t Perfection—It’s Connection

Summer doesn’t have to feel chaotic. It also doesn’t have to run like a military operation.
Let go of the pressure to schedule every moment and start creating a rhythm that fits your unique family.

If you want help figuring out your summer flow (especially if sleep is off the rails), I’d love to support you.
Whether it’s setting up a routine, troubleshooting bedtime, or finding that elusive middle ground between chaos and control—I’ve got your back.

Let me know: Does your family thrive more with routines or schedules? I love hearing how different households make it work.

Routines or Schedules: What Works Best for Your Household?

Routines or Schedules: What Works Best for Your Household?

by | Parenting

Routines, Schedules, Parenting

In the hustle and bustle of modern life, finding a balance between routines and schedules can be a game-changer for families.

Both routines and schedules play crucial roles in creating a stable and nurturing environment for children, but they serve different purposes and offer unique benefits. Understanding the distinction between the two and how to implement them effectively can help your family thrive.

 

What Are Routines?

Routines are the regular, predictable activities that happen every day. They are the backbone of daily life, providing a sense of security and stability. Routines are less about specific times and more about the sequence of activities. For example, a bedtime routine might include brushing teeth, reading a story, and then lights out. The focus is on the order of events rather than the exact time they occur.

 

Benefits of Routines:

 

1. Security and Stability:

 

Routines provide a sense of predictability, which can be comforting for children. Knowing what comes next helps reduce anxiety and creates a sense of security.

2. Independence:

When children know what to expect, they can start to take responsibility for their own actions. For instance, a child who knows the bedtime routine can begin to brush their teeth and get ready for bed without constant reminders.

3. Skill Development:

Routines help children develop important life skills. For example, a morning routine that includes making the bed and getting dressed teaches responsibility and self-care.

4. Family Bonding:

Routines can create special moments for family bonding. A consistent bedtime story or a family dinner can become cherished traditions that strengthen family ties.

 

What Are Schedules?

Schedules, on the other hand, are more about timing. They involve planning specific activities at specific times. A schedule might include waking up at 7:00 AM, breakfast at 7:30 AM, and school drop-off at 8:00 AM. Schedules are particularly useful for managing busy days and ensuring that all necessary activities are completed.

 

Benefits of Schedules:

 
1. Time Management:

Schedules help families manage their time effectively. By allocating specific times for activities, you can ensure that everything gets done without feeling rushed or overwhelmed.

2. Consistency:

Schedules provide a consistent framework for the day. This consistency can be especially important for children who thrive on routine and predictability.

3. Productivity:

Having a schedule can increase productivity by reducing downtime and ensuring that important tasks are prioritized.

4. Flexibility:

While schedules provide structure, they can also be adjusted as needed. If an unexpected event occurs, you can rearrange the schedule to accommodate it.

 

Finding the Balance

While both routines and schedules offer valuable benefits, finding the right balance between the two is key. Here are some tips to help you strike that balance:

1. Start with Routines:

Begin by establishing strong routines for key parts of the day, such as morning, bedtime, and mealtimes. These routines will provide a stable foundation for your family’s daily life.

2. Introduce Schedules Gradually:

Once your routines are in place, start to introduce schedules for specific activities. For example, you might schedule homework time, extracurricular activities, and family outings.

3. Be Flexible:

Life is unpredictable, and it’s important to be flexible with both routines and schedules. If something unexpected comes up, don’t be afraid to adjust your plans. Flexibility is key to maintaining a healthy balance.

4. Involve Your Children:

Include your children in the process of creating routines and schedules. This involvement can help them feel more invested and responsible for following the plan.

5. Monitor and Adjust:

Regularly review your routines and schedules to see what’s working and what isn’t. Be open to making changes as needed to better meet your family’s needs.

 

Practical Examples

 
Morning Routine:

– Wake up
– Brush teeth
– Get dressed
– Eat breakfast
– Pack school bag

Morning Schedule:

– 7:00 AM: Wake up
– 7:15 AM: Brush teeth and get dressed
– 7:30 AM: Eat breakfast
– 7:45 AM: Pack school bag
– 8:00 AM: Leave for school

Bedtime Routine:

– Take a bath
– Put on pajamas
– Read a story
– Lights out

Bedtime Schedule:

– 7:00 PM: Take a bath
– 7:15 PM: Put on pajamas
– 7:30 PM: Read a story
– 8:00 PM: Lights out

Conclusion

Routines and schedules are both essential tools for creating a stable and nurturing environment for your family. Routines provide the security and predictability that children need, while schedules help manage time and ensure that important tasks are completed. By finding the right balance between the two, you can create a harmonious and productive daily life for your family. Remember to be flexible, involve your children in the process, and regularly review and adjust your plans to meet your family’s evolving needs. With the right approach, routines and schedules can help your family soar.

Be the Person You Want Your Child to Be

Be the Person You Want Your Child to Be

by | Parenting

 

 

As parents, we all want our children to grow up to be compassionate, kind, and responsible individuals. But have you ever stopped to think about the role you play in shaping their behaviour?

 

The Power of Mirror Neurons:

 

Did you know that children are like little sponges, absorbing everything around them? Research has shown that children mimic the emotions and behaviours of those closest to them. This phenomenon, known as mirror neurons, highlights the importance of modeling the behaviours and attitudes we wish to see in our children. If we want our little ones to be empathetic, respectful, and kind, it starts with us embodying those qualities ourselves.

 

Addressing Our Own Behaviour:

 

When we notice a behaviour in our child that we’re not particularly fond of, our immediate reaction might be to focus solely on correcting them. However, it is crucial to first reflect on whether this behaviour is inadvertently coming from us or another loved one. Perhaps, without realizing it, we have been demonstrating that behaviour ourselves. Addressing our own actions and emotions may be necessary before expecting our child to change.

 

Influencing Others:

 

It’s important to acknowledge that we can’t always change the behaviour of others, but we can certainly influence it. If you notice a behaviour in someone else that you don’t appreciate, talking to them calmly and expressing your concerns might eventually lead to positive change. Explaining to your child what you don’t like about someone else’s behaviour can also serve as a valuable teaching moment, helping them understand the importance of certain qualities and behaviours.

 

Apologizing and Embracing Mistakes:

 

Nobody is perfect, including parents. In fact, it is through our mistakes that we can teach our children valuable life lessons. As parents, we must be willing to label our mistakes and apologize to our children when necessary. By doing so, we demonstrate a crucial lesson in handling mistakes – taking responsibility, offering an apology, and showing our children how to own up to their own errors. Remember, children learn from our mistakes and how we deal with them.

 

Reflecting on Our Own Behaviour:

 

At times, we may notice unexpected behaviours in our children that leave us puzzled. However, it’s essential to reflect on our own behaviours and emotions to uncover potential triggers. Are we inadvertently exhibiting those behaviours in certain situations or with certain people? By examining our own actions, we can provide explanations for our children’s behaviour and work towards a solution together.

 

Conclusion:

 

In the journey of parenthood, we are the architects of our children’s character. To raise empathetic, responsible, and kind individuals, we must embody those qualities ourselves and be the person we want our child to be. Leading by example, addressing our own behaviour, fostering communication, and embracing our mistakes can guide our children towards leading fulfilling lives. Remember, by being the person you want your child to be, you are not only shaping their future but also making life easier and more enjoyable for the entire family.

​

Back to School: Safe Place to Land

Back to School: Safe Place to Land

by | Parenting

Back-to-school season is upon us. Some children are already back to school and some are preparing for this adventure to begin! This can be a huge adjustment for our precious little ones. Often our little, and not-so-little, ones do not have the words to express their worries, questions, fears or excitement. This is where the safe place to let things out comes in.

 
How can you help if they do not tell you what they need?

Let’s put this in perspective. You have just started a new job. Imagine all the emotions you go through. It is hard for you to pinpoint what exactly is causing you angst but you can at least state “I am nervous”. Then you start to verbally unload on a friend or family member. After that conversation, you feel so much better.

Children are famous for acting out their feelings as opposed to talking. The first weeks back to school, I would recommend that you are prepared for many different emotional outbursts to happen. Know that these emotional responses are your child’s way of dealing with the changes. They have absolutely nothing to do with you!

Your child may seem absolutely fine when they get home, then all of a sudden they are freaking out because their sibling touched them him or the couch is not comfortable or ……(you get the point). Just know that this is to be expected. Being the safe place for your child to unload emotionally will benefit them in the long run.

 
Does this mean that you can’t explain that the outbursts are not acceptable??

No. It means that you can help your child learn that they are reacting to things instead of dealing with their emotions from the day. It is the whole concept of being “proactive instead of reactive”.

One of the most helpful things that I have found is to ask the question “I am wondering if…”. I will often state “I am wondering if you are tired or hungry”. Also, labeling what you see is important. “Man I am noticing that when you get home from school you get angry”.

 
How can you help your child cope with all this emotion?
  1. If your child is one that loves hugs, meet them with open arms!
  2. Have a snack prepared so your child does not get “hangry”.
  3. Plan a low-key evening for the first few weeks.
  4. Put your phone or other electronics away and give your child your attention.
  5. Engage in some fun play or roughhousing. Laughter can be just as therapeutic as crying.
  6. Let your child guide his play with you for about 10 to 15 minutes. Child Directed play rocks!

 

I encourage you to be your child’s safe place to land at the end of the day! Slowly over time, you will see a major reduction in your child’s emotional reactions. This will be your cue that your child is beginning to adjust to the new grade. If the behaviour does not change then I would recommend reaching out for additional supports.

3 Magic Little Words

3 Magic Little Words

by | Parenting

Do you ever feel like there is so much going on that you do not know where to start or that you will never get things accomplished? This can be the start of major overwhelm! And guess what???….

THIS IS A NORMAL FEELING!

Many people go through this and it can be extremely stressful. As parents, this feeling can happen often. This is true for stay-at-home moms/dads, work-from-home moms/dads, working moms/dads, foster parents, step-parents, etc.

It even happens to me!! Yes, you heard that correctly. I am normal (at least I believe I am 😛 ).

Now that the cat is out of the bag, what can we do about it??

Perspective is important! Rethink the way you think. …huh????

When I find myself saying “I have to……”. The list becomes so long that no one will be able to accomplish it. Then replace “I have to” with…

“I GET TO”

Yes, that is correct. I will say “I get to prepare lunch”, or “I get to play with the little man”. You get the point. This word change helps immensely. Even at 3 am when our little man needs to be tucked back into bed.

So if you are in the midst of sleep-teaching your child, trying to figure out your child’s behavior, overwhelmed at work, and have a to-do list that is getting bigger by the moment please remember to breathe and say “I get to”.

This simple word shift can cause you to have a different perspective about the task at hand. When we are able to look at things in a more positive light the overwhelm reduces and we often feel better able to cope. I hope you are able to have a wonderful day and change your perspective if needed.

All the best!